Monday, March 06, 2006

The Oscars

Okay, only because editors across the country are making their reporters troll the web in search of blogs talking about the Oscars to find out if those "hip young kids" with the blogs who are supposed to be Jon Stewart's audience thought he was funny or not --


And I really don't care that the audience at the Awards obviously didn't think so; they're a little too full of themselves anyway, and if they can't laugh at themselves, they're dorks.

They show should have been MORE Jon Stewart, FEWER awkward presentations by actors who can act but are clearly incapable of speech-making, teleprompter reading, or delivering a joke. Which isn't a bad thing; they're actors, not news anchors or politicians or comedians. But it's my least favorite part of the Awards every year, this belief that just because they're actors, it's okay to put them up on TV in front of millions of people to read horribly lame jokes clearly written by 50-year-old men working for the Academy because they're third-rate comics who couldn't get a job either AS a comic, or WRITING for a good comic, and to watch them flouder and stammer and generally be painful, painful, painful to watch.

There are some who do the whole "live" thing gracefully and well - Jessica Alba was pretty good last night; Jennifer Garner, who even tripped on her dress, was graceful and entertaining. George Clooney. Ben Stiller. But oh my God, quit subjecting us to Nicole Kidman, who's wooden as a board when she does these things, and to poor Naomi Watts. They're wonderful actresses - better than Alba and Garner - who are incapable of "presenting." It's painful. I'm embarassed for them.

So less of them. And more of the stars who can actually talk live, or without a script, and more Jon Stewart. Because he was HILARIOUS.

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